Day 3 - I Want a Chance to Thank Her

Today was a surprise. I slept until 4:00 p.m. Yes, exactly. I slept all day long! My conclusion? That sprinting of mine has caught up to me. During the past four days I have probably slept an average of 3 hours per night. By last night my body was in serious rebellion. In the middle of the night I finally decided to satisfy its twitching insanity with two Tylenol and a muscle relaxant. End result ... a late start on my day is better than a No Show.  One more time, I am glad I know the teacher for this course! (smiles)

Last night I had the most fun sharing my blog with my EC. I was a little nervous when he read the part of Day 1 that said he totally was backing my project. Was he really backing it or was that part of a fantasy? Whew! He thought for a moment and he told me that he backed me and if he backed me then that meant he also backed my project. What a rewarding comment. I love him. Now you see why it is so important for me to learn how to take care of him and value his opinions. Though I love him, showing that has been difficult for me. I think I just don't really know how to. Either that or ... I just haven't wanted to take care of him. Both are somewhat true due to some unfortunate experiences I have had in this area. So my EC should suffer for that? Humbly I say, "No." Please God teach me to let this man into my life. He says he's not going anywhere, but why tempt fate? Of all of the goals I chose, this one will be the most challenging and I think the most valuable.

As a report on my efforts: I have been reading Eat, Pray, Love for the first time and I'm sure not the last. I love, love, love reading it! Elizabeth, you have such an amazing gift of writing! You are both serious and funny at that same time. I sorrow for you and rejoice with you. You have an amazing way of now looking back at hard and difficult things and opening yourself up to the world to explore with us real emotions, real life struggles, and real life success.

As I was reading in bed last night, my husband was reading something beside me. I would snicker under my breath so as not to disturb him. As I did this I realized I really wanted to share something with him that was resonating with me. He agreed and I read him a piece. I couldn't stop laughing as I read it. It was so me. Right there in Liz's book! (Can I call you Liz?) In Chapter 5, she wrote "Imagine his surprise to discover that the happiest, most confident woman he'd ever met was actually - when you got her alone - a murky hole of bottomless grief." Boy, did we laugh over that! My sweet EC married me almost four years ago and guess what he found? Yep, two me's! Yikes!

I also liked when in that same chapter Elizabeth described herself "even under the best of circumstances, given that I am the planet's most affectionate life-form (something like a cross between a golden retriever and a barnacle)." Boy, was I laughing then! That also described me.

My EC really enjoyed me reading to him from the book. Fond memories of his own enjoyment of reading were perhaps returning. He expressed his happiness at my desire to read it. Jeez, I say, "Why did I wait so long to try it?" Can anybody say Green Eggs and Ham? Well, after some persuasion, I like it. I like Green Eggs and Ham. OK? (smiles) Maybe it just had to be my own idea. Seriously, am I really so stubborn? But I digress.

I am now into Chapter 12. Elizabeth has just now finally found "the early symptoms of contentment." "My weary body asked my weary mind: 'Was this all you needed, then?' There was no response. I was already fast asleep." She is finally in Italy after a very difficult divorce. What a wonderful adventure of pain and pleasure. Her goals in the book include not just experiencing pleasure, but learning the art of pleasure in Italy. The art of devotion in India. The art of balancing the two in Indonesia. What a concept! She felt the opposition of pleasure and devotion, but truly wanted to know each and to be able to live with them equally, thus the balance. She opened herself up to the Universe in petition, and the Universe answered her! The next part of her journey has just begun.

I told my husband last night that I want to write a letter to Elizabeth. I want her to know about my project. I want her to know how she has effected my life by just being herself. I put her website on the sidebar of my blog. I think I could write to her through that. But, .... I am nervous. What if she doesn't respond positively to my challenge or my blog or my comments as I read her book? Good Grief, though I have never been one, I think I feel like a Groupie. I don't want to worship her, I just want a chance to really thank her. Though I don't know her, Elizabeth Gilbert is changing my life.

396 days to go.